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Saturday, July 30, 2005 

A Fun Lunch Hour

You're at the office, watching the clock, waiting for noon to roll around. Finally, the clock decides it's time to let you free. You and a few buddies look for a place to eat. You can hit up Subway, maybe stop at McD's if you're really in a hurry, or you can go to the strip club and get laid.

This seemed interesting to me for a few reasons. As far as I know, WI does not have the same offended party rule concerning undercovers as FL does. However, prostitution is a crime here (no, duh) and so is solicitation of drinks WI Stat 944.36. I think our lewd and lascivious statute covers the same ground as FL's exposure of a sexual organ statute. Their name is better though.

Be sure to click the link with the stripper mugshots. Some of them are pretty rough looking. One seems to be missing an eye. The one with the huge smile on her face is my favorite. "Yay, I'm getting arrested!"

Before arresting the women Thursday, the undercover deputies watched nude dancers on stage, bought some of them drinks, and received lap dances from others.

Forget law school, I'm becoming a vice officer in Florida. No income tax and lappers while on the clock.

I'm not sure if I understand what the "solicitation of drinks" statute means exactly. Also... exposure of a sexual organ is pretty much the essence of any run-of-the-mill strip club. If that is illegal in Pasco County, then (1) how is this club running in the first place, and (2) why are the strippers arrested and not the propietor?

Please Advise.

Solicitation of drinks is a pretty minor crime. It's a Class B misdemeanor in WI (fine no greater than $1000; no more than 90 days in jail). It's sort of a roundabout prostitution thing in this situation. I think it has a lot to do with the defense "I didn't pay her for a hummer, I bought her a drink or drinks." As far as I can tell, the statute originally had to do with tossing barflies out of bars. Now, it is only enforced when the cops want to get you with another charge, like here. If it was enforced, anything with a uterus on Water St. would be in jail.

As for the sexual organ thing... Before I get into this, a caveat: I would never go to a strip club and of course most of this is conjecture on my part, and some of it is research I did for my church group.

Most strip clubs are not full nude. There are local rules about it. Sometimes municipalities or counties will say that full nude clubs are ok but they can't serve liquor. Sometimes, you can bring your own booze in and the clubs sell mixers. I think in TN you can't have a strip club within 30 feet of a place that sells liquor. Even in places like Las Vegas where they allow full nude, most clubs are not. The full nude ones tend to be a little raunchier and the girls are less than top shelf. There are even local rules on lap dances. Some places only allow table dances, no contact (editorial comment: What's the fucking point then?!).

As far as I can tell, Pasco County allows topless clubs only so the bottoms must stay on. Orlando has the same rule, but I blame that on the power of Disney. I'm sure that the owner of the club got nailed for something too, the shitty newspaper just left that part out. Keeping a place of prostitution (WI stat 944.34) is a felony here, so I bet it is one in FL too.

This is what my law practice should be. Stripper law.

The above is not legal advice.

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About me

  • I'm Steve
  • From Milwaukee, Wisconsin, United States
  • "There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." P.J. O'Rourke
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